Chunky Judy was a man. But she, I mean HE was pissed because his name was Judy then to make matters worse he went and got all chunky. Not like fat, I mean he was big, like naturally, but I mean chunky like chunks in the body, you know? I hope you know what I mean. It’s like when someone just has a real specific body type. Gosh, it sure is hard not calling someone named Judy “she”. Even when you know he is a he. This is where our story begins...
Chunky Judy would get so sensitive if people would call him a her or a she that he would threaten them. Tiny Lester one day at the grown-up playground was like "Haha Chunky Judy you make me wanna call you a she despite your natural masculinity." Chunky Judy got so mad that he told Tiny Lester that that was it! He said “that’s it!” He told Tiny Lester that he was going to give him a hard hug. A hard hug from Chunky Judy is not an affectionate hug. It’s like if Chunky Judy said “I’m gonna sit on you I’m heavy.” Like I said Chunky Judy’s not heavy per se. Just Chunky. So now Tiny Lester got hard hugged, he was in bad shape. The authorities and the principal of the grown-up world said “You better get into my office, Chunky Judy!” Chunky Judy took off, ran. Principal Dincipal turned to the authorities and said “Get her in my office.” They corrected him and said “Uh, remember Chunky Judy is a he, Principal Dincipal.” Then Principal Dincipal said oh yeah.
Chunky Judy’s now on the lamb, She-fuck-HE is now driving in a convertible listening to country music and picking up hitchhikers. But none try to get fresh, for fear of the famous, well NOW famous Chunky Judy Trademark Hard Hug of Legend. That’s right, 2 things. One is that once a hitchhiker tried to get fresh with Chunky Judy, do some stuff that Judy wasn’t into, he tried to get sexy w/ Chunky Judy. You know some of those road drifters are out looking for that sort of thing, maybe they didn’t feel like they could pursue that sort of lifestyle in their hometowns so they had to go on the road for it, maybe they read about it in some freeform poetry book or something. And two, remember how I mentioned that Chunky Judy’s Trademark Hard Hug is now famous and something of legend? Well that’s because when Chunky Judy hit the road after hardhugging Tiny Lester, Tiny Lester took that painful experience and capitalized on it. He wrote a whole story about his overcoming the repercussions of the Hard Hug and made a lot of money. Now Chunky Judy is very pissed because he wants a piece of his own action. He’s broke and on the road and getting felt up by drifters and not liking it at all, but secretly he does like it because he’s very repressed in the homosexual nature. Don’t you think he’d just change his name, otherwise? It can’t be that hard. He likes the struggle of saying he hates it and not wanting to change it. Work out your issues Chunky Judy, it’s okay. Chunky Judy heard me say that and he took “work out your issues” completely the wrong way. He showed up at Tiny Lester’s high security plus fancy marble mansion, which was guarded by Dobermans, or should I say Dobermen? Tiny Lester is very powerful now. Chunky Judy thought killing Tiny Lester would solve his problems but Lester people made Chunky Judy die. Such a tragic end for Chunky Judy. So misunderstood and so prone to misunderstanding.
