Friday, April 3, 2015

The Waiter

There was an event of people once, and they were all doing stuff. A Waiter was hired to help it run smoothly and keep the people in the event moving in the direction they needed to be going.

The Waiter weaved in and out of the places.
"Paddon me, a scuse a me!"said the Waiter.
"Thank you. No problem." said the folks he brushed by.

Someone raised a hand.
"Ah, waiter? Over here."
"Yesa madam." said the Waiter.

Then he weaved over to another spot.
"I'm a da waiter! I weave all about a da room!" said the Waiter.

Jack, the thoughtful fellow, was standing there. The Waiter breezed on over to Jack.
"Do you needa somm tin?" asked the Waiter.
"No thanks, not now." said Jack as he stood there.

The Waiter walked away.

"Looks like everyone in this room is doing something." said Jack.
"Wish I could see it all, I'm blind." said Hannah.
"Oh, I didn't see you there." said Jack.
"That's funny. I'm the blind one, and you didn't see me!" said Hannah.
"That's true. I was too busy remarking on how everyone in the room seemed to be doing something."
"Well, what are they doing?"
"Well, too much to say I guess." said Jack.
"Ah."
"I'm more interested in you actually... tell more more about you." said Jack.

Hannah chatted to Jack. Over elsewhere in the room Angela got drunk. Paul watched her. Max was hairy. The indoor wind blew. Some of Max's hair blew into Chuck's salad. Chuck ate it anyway. Gertrude stared at Chuck's salad as he ate it. Then she ate a cookie.

"Can I get a you anodda cookie?" asked the Waiter.
"Yes." said Gertrude.

Gertrude loved the cookie. She knew she shouldn't have another, but she also knew the waiter was gonna bring her the cookie if she asked for it. So she did. What power she wielded.

Guess what though? The Waiter was a robot. And all those assholes at the event were too busy with their heads up their asses to even notice. Even that nice blind lady Hannah. The event was run by an evil corporation trying to build robot people to take our jobs, it all starts with the wait jobs. Then you'll see what jobs those robots take next. For god's sake don't attend those fucking stuffy events for robot makers!

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