The Chasers

Rico looked in the mirror at a mole on his back and it was big.  He was worried.

"Ooh I wonder if that is something I should worry more about." said Rico to himself. Then he made an anxious facial expression.

"Pound pound pound!" said the door.
"Uh oh, they're here." said Rico.

It was the chasers. The chasers had been chasing Rico for a long time. He should have known they'd find him at his home. The chasers were comprised of bosses, bills collectors, an ex-girlfriend, a school teacher, a meter maid, a buddy he'd see around who chatted too close and had hot breath, a handful of liberals, and one monster. They were frightening.

"There's stuuff we neeeed from youuu." said the chasers.
"No! Leave me alone!" Rico shouted through the window.
"We have expectaaationsss!"
"They aren't legitimate expectations, I'm only projecting them onto you!" shouted Rico, believing he was making up his concerns about the chasers.
"Noo, they are legitimate and you're not going craazzyyy..."
"Oh no, I've gotta get away." said Rico.

Rico tried to jump out of the bathroom window but they had the place surrounded. He managed to penetrate their ring around the house. He ran and ran and ran and got winded, because he'd recently put on weight.

"Damn I need to get in better shape." said Rico.
"We have just added a personal trainerrr naamed Brittanyyy!" moaned the chasers.
"Let me teach youuu to worrrk ouutt!" said Brittany the chaser.
"I woulddd love it if you looked fit on the jobb..." said a chaser boss of Rico's.
"Get away from me you chasers!" shouted Rico as he ran more.

The chasers chased.

Rico got cornered to where he could run no more. It was the end of the line. He would have to give all the chasers everything they wanted. They surrounded him tightly. Then just as he was almost in their grasp, he melted to slop and turned to sludge on the ground. It was his only escape. Their filthy soles stamped on him and absorbed his goo.

The chasers loosely scattered slowly in different directions, disappointed. Then they went and found other things to chase.