Brandon the Mope at a Holiday Party

Brandon the Mope was the life of the party. Everyone loved Brandon the Mope. He knew how to get the party started. A holiday party where Brandon the Mope was expected was off to a slow start.
"When the hell is Brandon gonna get here?!" said everyone at the party.

Brandon the Mope appeared from behind a door.
"Hey guys, I got here a few minutes ago, I figured no one would notice or care." said Brandon the Mope.
"Hooray it's Brandon!!" said the party.
"People, people, gather around, Brandon's here!" said Jodie the host.
"Everyone else gets noticed more than me." mumbled Brandon, as everyone eagerly surrounded him, smiling and patting him on the back.

Brandon angled himself in a position where he could zone out at whatever was playing on the television. An admirer saddled up next to him.
"Hey Brandon I loved your most recent accomplishment." said an admirer.
"I'm not very good at anything." said Brandon.

Brandon walked away with his head down. People in every circle vocally discussed how great Brandon was. Dorian approached Brandon.
"People here love you!" declared Dorian.
"I get mistreated." said Brandon.
"Brandon, can I bring you anything, please? Here's some chips." said Sandy the cook.
"I eat too much and feel bad after." said Brandon.

Then Brandon wandered over to the snack table alone. A foxy holiday gal flanked him.
"You have such an amazing energy about you, Brandon." said the foxy lady with a red holiday dress.
"I'm gloomy."
"Wow, I love gloom." said the foxy gal.
"I'm not that interesting." said Brandon, as he turned the opposite way.
"Gee that's fascinating, tell me more!" said the foxy gal to the space that Brandon was standing, as Brandon walked away.

Boisterous Sammy Jay approached Brandon the Mope, "Brandon! Buddy, so what else is new?"
"It's been a cruddy year."
"I love your energy and attitude buddy, gimme a hug!" said Sammy Jay, then he grabbed Brandon and squeezed him.
"I'm so glad you're here!" said Sammy Jay.

Then the foxy red holiday dress gal came over again. "Brandon I'm having so much fun with you right now, you're so much fun to be around."
"I feel like everyone wants me to leave." said Brandon.
"Good idea, let's get out of here." said foxy gal.
"My place is filthy."
"We can go to my place if you'd rather go there." said foxy.
"I'm allergic to cats." said Brandon.

The following week the foxy gal called Brandon and told him what a blast she had with him. Then Brandon the Mope went out with her for a long time and he also made lots of money and success the following year.

Kevin the Mope watched it all happen. "That guy Brandon is an asshole and everyone thinks he's better than me." said Kevin.