The Flavor Fellow

Sugar Man was so sweet. He was made of sugar.

"Hey lady can I help you with your groceries?" said Sugar Man to the old lady.
"Aw you are so sweet, Sugar Man." said the old lady.
"You want to lick me too?" said Sugar Man.
"Yes I do." said the old lady.

Then the old lady licked him. He didn't actually expect her to. He was making a joke. She took it as a literal offer.

"Mmmm," said the old lady. "You're so sweet."
"Uh, thank you."

Then everyone wanted to lick Sugar Man.

"Hey lemme get a little lick!" said people.
"Ew people have got to stop licking me!" said Sugar Man.
"Even me?" said Salt Lady.
"Salt Lady?" said Sugar Man.

Salt Lady was a lady made of salt. Sugar Man had the hots for her but could never seem to say the right thing around her. Because everyone was getting those licks in on Sugar Man, word had gotten around to Salt Lady that he was someone to see. She always had a mild interest in him. But not a spicy one.

"That's right it's me." said Salt Lady, "Think I could get a lick?"
"I hear we'd make a great mix." said Sugar Man
"Ehh, more of an acquired taste, I'd say." said Salt Lady.
"Ooh you're salty, lady." said Sugar Man.
"You better watch your mouth. It true though." said Salt Lady, with a wink.
"We have good chemistry." said Sugar Man
"Literally!" said Salt Lady.
"Hey babe are we gonna have kettle corn babies or what?" said Sugar Man.
"As long as I don't wind up your little flavor of the month!"
"Don't break my cubes, I won't crack your rocks, how's that sound?" said Sugar Man.
"I have a peppered past, but I'm not bitter!"

Then Salt Lady and Sugar Man went home and licked each other a bunch.