Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Bobby at School

Bobby was a kid at school who was cute but he was trying to be cool so that means he’s in the not cool group and people don’t notice he’s cute. Except the smart ones, because the cool ones are always the dumb ones who grow up to get wrinkled before everyone else. Bobby would walk down the halls and people would throw wads of paper at him, hoot and holler and he would yell back like “Aw shut up! I’m tough too! I’m tough too!” Along the way to class as he’d walk past the shitheads that he yelled with, he’d quiet up when he’d pass Isabelle at her locker. She’s a messy frazzled little thing. But sweet. And they’d stop and stare at each other and do that thing where people look up and down and shift from foot to foot. Then Bobby would remember he was cool, even though he wasn’t, and walk off hoping no one saw him talking to dusty ol’ Isabelle (who was very cute in like a European messy sort of way, but when you’re young like that you don’t really understand what’s pretty if it’s not the tough guy’s bimbo babe or Kathy Ireland or whoever is the famous babe of the day).

One day Bobby got in a car accident and had to walk down the hall on crutches. He still got a good amount of hootin’ and hollerin from the will-be-ugly-someday shitheads. So on down the hall he passes by Isabelle at her locker, and even though Bobby is all mangled and mussed, it’s still the same thing. Bobby snubs her! Bobby what a schmuck you are. He’s got some more mistakes to make I guess. You probably thought I was going to say that he learned his lesson from that car accident and now he and Isabelle are gonna get to know each other and explore the youthful chemistry that Bobby seems to deny. But you forget these folks are just kids, kids don’t know anything about learning from experience. Actually they’re not kids, they’re dogs! Bobby’s my dog and he didn’t get in a car accident he got neutered so now he’s miserable w/ a cone on his head because he wants to lick his penis. And Isabelle is a name I made up for a little dog that is nice to him when he walks down the street, but you get what I’m saying. The End.