Friday, October 31, 2014

The Wind

Rhonda was sitting at home eating crackers. She started getting sweaty. She opened a window. A breeze of wind blew. She sat back in her chair.

There were some loose papers on the coffee table. They blew off from the breeze.
"Oof." said Rhonda, as she bent over to pick them up.

They blew off again.
"I guess I need a paper weight." said Rhonda.

The closet door, by the kitchen, was open. She ate another cracker. The closet door started to creak closed, "Errr..", then it shut, "Klee-unk."
"Must have been the wind." said Rhonda.

The cabinets in the kitchen were also open, because Rhonda was somewhat dim, and disorganized. She didn't think to do stuff like close the cabinets. Suddenly they all slammed shut "Wamp", "Framp", "Klonk", "Cronk", they all said real fast in succession.
"Sheesh, that wind." she said.

A nice vase on the countertop flew off the table and crashed into the wall, "Whoo-pshoo!", splattering flowers and water, but instead of water it was actually filled with blood, so blood is what splattered everywhere, actually.
"Will this wind ever stop?!" asked Rhonda, humorously exasperated.

Rhonda reached for a cracker and they all rose up to the ceiling, levitating, then rained down on her like cracker-hail. Pieces of broken cracker stuck into her cheeks like shards of glass.
"Silly wind blew my crackers off the cracker tray!" Rhonda exclaimed, with surprise in her heart.

Rhonda's arms were tired anyway, from reaching over to grab so many crackers, so she decided to rest her arms on the comfortable arm rests of her chair. She looked at her tired arms. Suddenly, before her very eyes, multiple scratches and cuts appeared on her arms.
"Slik. Slik. Slit!" they said.
"Ouch! Dang wind." she said.
"Get. Out." said a loud whisper voice that echoed through her home.
"This wind's noisy!" declared Rhonda.

Rhonda decided to reach for her cup of relaxing tea, that had been sitting out cooling for a couple of hours. She brought the teacup to her mouth, sipped a tiny sip, and the water was beyond scalding hot. It burned the tip of her lip and started bleeding.
"Yow! Hey wind, where were you on that one ha ha!" she said out loud, "Shoulda blown some of that 'hot' away!"

Then her chair blew over, with her seated, dragging her across the room, and caging her against the wall."It's surprise-windy out today! The news needs a new meteorologist, that's for sure." she laughed, as blood trickled from her upper lip.

Finally, screams wailed from her walls, the chair rose and clung to the ceiling like a magnet, so did Rhonda, so did the cracker crumbs, so did all her home wares, the stove flames ignited, the flowers on the floor wilted and rose, everything began to rotate around the room, and blood rained from the floor up to the ceiling. It was the setting of a nightmare. Rhonda spun around the room.
"Gosh, this wind sure is kooky!" she shouted.

All at once everything stopped, collapsed to the floor in silence.
"Oh, fuck you." said a deep echoey voice.

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