Friday, January 23, 2015

Big Mouth Blatherhouse

Big Mouth Blatherhouse wouldn't shut up.
"Hey Everyone it's all about me!!!" he said.

He ran his trap all the time.
"Let me tell ya another thing! Cuz I know about it!" he went on.

He always had a big opinion about everything.
"The Star Guy in the movie Space Station could never win in a dual against Lizard Jerry from the movie Reptile Planet! It's a fact!"

 People didn't want to hear it.

"Shut up Blatherhouse." said people.
"...and so I said ...but he told me... so I went up to him ...and that's how I got to be the boss of him!" he blathered.
"Oy vay, make him stop!" said everyone else around him.

But Big Mouth Blatherhouse would just keep talking and not listen to the people around him.  He also couldn't be trusted if he did listen to them.

"Big Mouth, can I tell you a secret?" said Jenny Sweetstuff.
"Sure, Jenny Sweetstuff. I think you're so special and such a babe and you can always trust me because I'm like a down to earth honest stud, obviously." shouted Big Mouth Blatherhouse. He fancied himself a smooth talking ladies man with a sensitive perspective. And a sensitive touch.
"Okay. I have two secrets." said Jenny.
"I'm also a great lover!! Let me hear both your secrets!" said Big Mouth.
"The first one is that I have an eating disorder. The second one is that one time I had my heart broken." said Jenny Sweetstuff.
"Sweetstuff, don't worry. Your sweet secret is safe with me." he said.

Then he went and told everyone. What a big mouth!
"Yeah Jenny Sweetstuff is in love with me, she confessed all this personal stuff to me and I have her wrapped around my finger. You know she has an eating disorder? Go easy on her she's real fragile! I might take her out, still thinking about it..." said Big Mouth in front of a lot of people, to Ted Dweebo, who had a big crush on her.
"I'm so sad he told everyone my secrets." said Jenny Sweetstuff, when she found out.

Jenny Sweetstuff also had poor judgement for even thinking she could trust a guy like Big Mouth Blatherhouse. It was probably her upbringing.

Big Mouth Blatherhouse also had such a big mouth that he ate children and didn't even realize it.

"Where's my baby?" said Judith the Mom, about a baby that Big Mouth Blatherhouse ate.

One day the town was terrified, because it was a harbor town, and this big mean whale Jehoshaphat was headed toward the land and this whale always liked to eat a person then go back to sea. The town thought they could be sneaky and push Big Mouth Blatherhouse to the harbor and Jehoshaphat the Whale would eat him. So they drugged and kidnapped Big Mouth one night then left him on the harbor for Jehoshaphat to swallow. But when Blatherhouse woke up he started blathering at the approaching Jehoshaphat and Jehoshaphat got real worn out and tired of Blatherhouse's blathering, and Jehoshaphat the Whale had a heart attack. PETA was pissed off, and Big Mouth Blatherhouse declared himself the king whale of the town. And the town never heard the last of it.

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