John Tits wanted a beer after work because he was tired. He went to the beer restaurant and sat at the table. The restaurant's doctor approached.
"Hi Doctor can I has a beer?" said John Tits.
"Hello Mr. Tits how ares you family?" asked Doctor.
"Oh don't get me start on them! Just beer please." said Mr. Tits.
"Okay I will prescribe you one beer let me know if that not enough." said Doctor.
The Doctor brought John Tits a beer.
"Glug glug glug glug. Aaahhhh." said John Tits, "Hey Doctor you served me an empty beer what gives?" he continued.
"Hey are you trying to trick me? I'm sure it had beer in the beer." said Doctor.
"Hehe." said John
"It's unlawful to trick a Doctor."
"Okay you got me. I drinked it. Gimme a new beer now so I can drink it too." said John Tips.
Doctor prescribed him another beer.
"Thanks for the subscription, Doc!" said John Tits.
John Tits wanted to hear some tunes so he sauntered over to the jukebox with his quarter. There were so many good songs to choose between.
"Play the audio from the Hindenburg Disaster!" shouted Bambi Potson.
"I can't play that one. Brings back too many bad memory." said John Tits.
"Oh I sorry." said Bambi.
"No it's okay. It's just, we played that at my wedding. Then my wife left me."
"Oh I so sorry." said Bambi.
"For what?" asked John
"That your wife left you."
"Yeah she left me at the grocery store to buy store-bought pizza while she went and ate at Pizza Teepee, which is my favorite pizza place. And she knows I prefer it to store-bought. Boy was I mad that day." said John Tits.
"Play 'Houston, we have a Problem'," said Bambi.
"Ooh that one really makes me shake my tushie." said John Tits.
John Tits and Bambi started boogie-woogie-ing on the dance floor to the Apollo 13 astronauts in distress audio. It was really riling the joint up. Then the school principal, Mr. Dukens walked in.
"Hey you two don't you know there's no dancing here!?" said the principal.
"Uhh.. Hi Mr. Dukens." said John Tits.
"Why don't you two keep a little distance between you and go back to drinking your beers?" said Principal Dukens.
"Yes sir." said John, as the principal walked away.
"Ugh, can't stand him he's such a lamewad." muttered John to Bambi.
"Hey wanna get outta here?" asked Bambi.
"Okay, whadaya say you come back to my place and you and my wife talk about sewing while I check on my baby boy who is sleeping and whisper that I love him." said John Tits.
John and Bambi paid their tab and headed for the door.
"Don't forget to tie your shoelace every day!" said the Doctor.
"I love that guy he so concern for my health." John.
Then they went to the wrong house with a different woman and baby who played wife and son with John.